giving women voice through writing and photography

From worrier to warrior.

Worrier: a person who torments oneself with or suffers from disturbing thoughts.

Warrior: a person who shows great vigor, courage.

Last weekend we trekked to Minnesota, so that I could help my mom throw a bridal shower for one of my favorite cousins. The events leading up to bridal shower were, how shall I say it, a bit very stressful. As a result, my mom was very worried about the event– about the little things – would we have enough food – and about the bigger things – would there be a major blow-up between the conflicting parties.

In the aftermath, with drinks in hand, we were reflecting on how worried we were about the event and how well it actually went – we had just enough food and there were no major conflicts (perhaps a couple nasty looks, but nothing too bad).

I deeply desire that women go from being WoRRIeRS to WaRRIoRS.

I think the possibilities for this shift in frame of mind are significant.

Psychologists have suggested that rather than worrying about potentially stressful events, adopting a warrior perspective indicates that yes, it may be difficult, but we have the power and resources to cope with anything that comes our way.

I think we could also adopt this perspective when it comes to our bodies. Perhaps we can go from being at war with our bodies, worrying about how we appear to others to being warriors of our bodies, recognizing that we have strength and fighting power. Those things that experience has done to our bodies – the stretch marks from pregnancy, the wrinkles from age – are the battle scars that come with the territory. Rather than resorting to starvation or binging, which reflect a level of self-hatred toward our bodies, we could deal with difficulties straight-on. It’s something to consider.

Worrier or warrior? Which are you?

Are you empowered?

Girl power, as conceptualized by the Oxford English Dictionary, refers to power exercised by girls; specifically a self-reliant attitude among girls and young women manifested in ambition, assertiveness, and individualism.

I am ALL about empowering girls and women of all ages. I strongly desire that each girl and woman be able to tap into her inner strength, trust herself, and let her own song be heard.

I am woman, hear me roar. You go girl!

When I look to our culture, however, I am deeply disturbed and angered by the conflicting and limiting messages that we send about empowerment.

On the surface, girls and women have a multitude of means for empowerment. We can do anything we put our minds to. However, a closer look reveals a message that consumerism and sexualization are often required.

Spring’s latest fashions, the fad diet of the week, a haircut that properly frames your face, and, of course, the right push-up bra (that shows just enough, but not too much cleavage) will transform you from an invisible, insecure doormat to a powerful, butt-kicking diva.

If we only had these things, we’d march into our boss’s office and demand the promotion we deserve. We’d get into a meaningful relationship. We’d start that new creative project we’ve been dreaming about. We’d finally be able to look ourselves in mirror and respect what we see.

However, what most girls and women discover is that none of these things leads to genuine, long-lasting empowerment.

What if we took a slightly different approach? What if we realized that we already are empowered. There, I said it. You heard it here first. We already are strong. We already have an inner voice that we can trust. We already know what we want and how to get it.

Perhaps then we could use our resources (our money, our time, our energy) to invest in those things (yes, even shoes) that reflect our true, empowered self?

Are you empowered? I think know so. What are you going to do about it?